Amanda funny life rules

1. Anyone who cheats is a hore or a slut or both or whatever names you can think of.
2. If you say you will work out and lose weigh and never do, just stop saying it your lazy.
3.If you don't like your life, make one up as long as you tell me the truth, I don't care what you tell others.
4.Some people do need to be punched, most do not but a few just do and they may thank you for it later and that does happen. True story I made up for this one. Hehe
5. If you help everyone but yourself you really are more messed up then you thought. First fix yourself then save the world.
6. If you have kids and you do drugs you are a bad parents,PERIOD. There are no exceptions! If that offends you then you are one of those people.
7.Parents who make excuses for there bad parenting instead of just being honest and admitting there jerks should have themselves been aborted.
8.Get your mental illnesses right, Schizophrenia is not multiple personality's, they are 2 separate illnesses, learn to read!
9. Just because you think you are talented that does not mean anyone elas thinks so.
10. Give part of your income to a few cheritys. Then go to a third world country to help out for a month so you can learn that your fuckin cellphone is not important..
11. You are not the most important person in the world.
12. Esp is real and no you don't have it.
13.Its great to be a hippy if you want to be but just please wash yourself because when you can smell dirty Vagina by standing next to someone, that is just fuckin gross.
14. If your wondering if you smell, you probably do.
15.Your pets are your friends, you treat them with respect and love or dont have a pet.
16. If you cant afford the best dog food, you can afford a pet.
17. If you cant afford every vet visit your animal friend needs, you dont deserve to have a animal friend so don't!
18.If you are 29 but you look 50 then yes you are ugly.
19.If you have yellow teeth, thats just gross, period!
20.If you are a drunk, I probably hate you.
21. If you don't learn your lesson after 2 times, you are possibly stupid.
22. Dont leave 2 hour messages on my voice mail, just say your name and why you called, otherwise your annoying.
23.Dont ever tell a joke unless it's actually funny.
24.Dont blame it on PMS unless you actually have health issues, it's most likely your just a bitch.
25.Never ever tell me what to do or anyone elas I respect unless you have earned that right.
26.My cat's name is Monkey, I do not have a Monkey.
27. If you brake the law and get caught, maybe you should not uhhhh brake the law.
28.If you talk about other people in a bad way to people that have not earned that right then your a maggot.
29. Just because you think your dog is the smartest type, that does not mean it is. The facts on what dogs are the smartest can be read and yes my dog is in the top 5 so suck it. And yes Poor Pitbulls are lower on the scale but that does not mean they are not good dogs because loads are awesome!
30. I have a password on my computer so no one can use it so dont even ask if you can. Same with John's computer.
31.The Zune killed the ipod.
32. Play station sucks compared to x box 360.
33.A mullet is never in.
34.Everyone love Nintendo products, if you don't, you dont have a soul.
35.If you want me to visit you then you send me the plan tickets. I am sick of paying.
36.I am not a doormat, so don't even try walking on me.
37. I will help anyone that wants help, if you don't want it, dont ask.
666. I am not saying there is no God, but there is no factual proof that there is so stop lying about it.